Life Starts Now.

Living each day to the fullest, because we know first-hand just how fragile life can be.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011


You are 18 months old.  For eighteen months, my Father has been exfoliating what I once was, into a mother, who will one day be worthy of the precious little person you are.  Saying that I'm thankful for every day is so much of an understatement that it doesn't even seem right to be putting it out there.  But I am.  I'm so thankful.  And HONORED, to be the mommy of a special-needs child.  Somehow, I knew I had it in me.

A few cool things about you right now:

You love to dance.  To everything.  And you have great taste in music.  You've had music playing in your room almost every night since the day you were born, and you have a mommy who sings, so...I hope that music is as influential to you  one day as it is to me.  It's looking that way.  You can snap your fingers, and kick your feet to a beat, even when we don't notice that there is music playing. You find it before we do.

You have a temper.  (Like we didn't see this coming... ;)  I love it.  A person with opinions makes things happen, and you above anyone I know, can definitely do that.  You're at an age where your lack of vocabulary frustrates you, but we're working really hard to get past that.  You can say: No.  Mama.  Dada.  Papa.  (Mimi comes out 'meh,' but we know you're trying, and I had to give you something for the effort,) All done.  Molly-Molly (moy-moy), Dog.  More.  Up.  Hat.  Yes.  :)

You are snuggly.  We were so sad to say good-bye to duckie, the poor binkie that died, twice.  We've moved on to the froggie-binkie.  You don't seem to notice the difference, but lately, you want to snuggle more.  You plop down in the middle of the room when you touch a soft blanket.  When I come home, you give hugs, and you miss people when they're gone.  It impresses me, because I think I look for something to be wrong with, waiting for you to not progress or something....and then you do.  Continually surprising me.  Continually melting my heart in ways I never thought possible.  All props pointed to the sky.

Happy 18 months, sweet baby.  Thank you.  For all that you've taught me.  Over and over.

Friday, September 9, 2011

My baby, the Sparrow...

A couple of weeks ago, our nurse Debbie suggested that we connect with Matt Sampson of Southern Oregon Sparrow Club.  She thought we would be a good match for the Sparrow program and so did he.  Here is the program in a nutshell: Local schools pick a child from the area and "adopt" them.  The school is sponsored by a business, and that business pledges to pay students $10 for every hour of community service they do.  They money they raise goes to help families with special-needs children.

This is an amazing organization.  It started with one child, donating $60 to his teacher who had a son with Leukemia.  What an incredible way for kids to learn compassion and empathy for others.  You can learn more about Sparrow Clubs at

We were adopted this afternoon by Hedrick Middle School, at an assembly with 900 students.  It was an experience I will remember for the rest of my life.  I don't even know what else to say.  So moved.  So inspired.


Thursday, September 8, 2011


School started this week.  Connor woke up before six on his first day of school, had cheerios for breakfast, and put on his favorite new shoes, and the essential- the Ducks' jersey.  He was pretty nervous by the time we got to his class, but I have all faith that he's going to do great this year.  I can't believe the time has come for me to have Connor in all-day school.  Wow.  Time has flown.

Well, what the heck are we supposed to do now?

So, I've tried to stay away from the monotonous feeding posts, because really, it's boring.  And things are changing so fast with Joel that I could keep a blog just for the dang tube news.  We went down on his bolus feeds because he was eating so well by mouth.  And now he won't eat.  Again.  I thought by going down on his boluses we would increase his appetite....RIGHT??!!  Wrong.  He is being a picky toddler.  Now the micro-managing mother in me wants to make him eat.  Because that is what I would do with my other children.  Consistency would theoretically be a very key thing here.  But what about oral aversion?  Would forcing a child to eat be harmful to his tube wean in the long run?

He won't eat anything with calories, and we've actually had to supplement with another bolus feed tonight because he's not meeting the daily 300 calorie minimum.  I'm so bummed.  And feeling stuck. I don't want him to lose weight, and I really want us to meet our goal of him getting his tube out by next March. :/  Why didn't this kid come with a manual?!!

Monday, September 5, 2011


So it's no big secret that we punish Connor with push-ups.  It works great for a little guy with a temper.  When we got him started in Tae-Kwon Do, they were pretty impressed when he did all of his push-ups with his ankles crossed.  After the older kids found out they showed him how to do them one-armed and "clap push-ups".  He's a fanatic now.  I'm proud....and a little embarrased, as I can barely get out ten!  Go Connor!

List Maker

I am thankful for:

New friendships.
My husband who has new love for me everyday.
My parents
The house we live in.
Joel and everything that he is
My funny kid- Mia
My determined kid- Connor
My sweet to the bone kid- Logan
Valley weather
The girl at the makeup counter at Macy's
Curly hair
My creative side

Summer's End

Today was the last day before Connor starts first grade.  I'm so excited for Adam and my sanity through the next year, as Connor and Mia are in a "Ihatemysiblingsoi'mgoingtofightwiththemeverychanceiget" phase.  They are driving us bonkers.  But also, It's tough.  I can't believe our baby is going to be away from us all day.  It's also a very "time stamping" event.  That means that we've been living with my parents for an entire summer.  Like 3 months without my favorite coffee mugs or my shiney oversized black belt...or my couch or my bed....(I do have a's just not a tempurpedic ;)

Adam and I have started looking for rental housing in our budget, which is tiny by the way... and it appears that we either need to learn a second language, join a gang, or get our concealed licenses.....for real.  It's that bad.  I'm trying not to get discouraged, but I just don't know what else to do.  Apartment living is starting to become an option, but with 4 kids....ouch.  It's just not a good combo.  I know God will provide for our family.  The waiting is not very fun though. :) Story of my life!  HAHA  I can't wait to see all of our stuff again.  To have our own space....TO HAVE INTERCOURSE WITH MY HUSBAND WITHOUT MY PARENTS OR A NURSE NEARBY....  Oh, the simple things :)