Life Starts Now.

Living each day to the fullest, because we know first-hand just how fragile life can be.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Mommy Needs Peace

My day started out bad.  I mean REAL BAD.  Moving isn't fun anyway, besides the thought of a new adventure, and that wears off quick.  Switching Joel to Oregon services has proven to test my sanity, and sobriety.  (The last one was a joke...kind of.)  Washington state insurance was a piece of cake once we got him on straight medicaid, and during that battle I had a care manager to help with EVERYTHING.  Want to see a specific doctor on market street?  No problem.  Any doctor will take you.  Oregon isn't as easy.  Oregon providers only take a certain number of OHP patients.  And when I called around today, I got rejected by pediatrician's offices....and it left a bad taste in my mouth.  Why isn't Oregon medicaid accepted in all offices?  Anyone know the answer to that question?  I don't.

And then there was the getting Joel ON Oregon insurance.  Which requires a social security card and a birth certificate.  Anyone want to guess where that birth certificate is?  Either in storage container #1, or storage container #2......not enthused about digging through boxes for that piece of paper.

Oh, and then there was the GI doctor from dornbeckers that apparently doesn't have any openings for three to four months, and won't be referring me to anyone closer than Portland because there aren't any pediatric specialists outside of Portland.  Grrreeeeeaaat.

BUT, (this does get better, I promise...) I was driving down Stewart Avenue today to sign a release form at the PT office, and I was so worked up from my morning of aggravating rejection calls.  While stopped at a red light, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace that I haven't felt in months.  And I was reminded of one simple statement.  "You were made to be Joel's mom." 

Instantly it didn't matter what people wouldn't make appointments with us.  It didn't matter what specialists said about wait time, or what obstacles were in our way.  My God is bigger than that.  I am Joel's mommy because I have the ability to persevere through seemingly impossible situations.  I'm not supposed to take no for an answer; I just need to find the right people and ask the right questions.  I am a woman of FAITH.  Thank you, Holy Spirit for guiding me through my day.  One day at a time.


  1. Oh too right! Straight from the mouth of the Holy Spirit whispered in your ear, you amazing woman you! You ARE made to be Joel's mommy... and you are continuing to BE made to be his mommy. God's mercies are new every morning and he is working overtime on your behalf. Trust that he wants to find the perfect care team for Joel and the places that will not make appointments with you are closed doors ON PURPOSE. Trust, sweet lady... trust. I will be praying that this peace that you have continues :)

  2. "Peace like a River" is amazing stuff. Not the fluffy peace of calm moments & butterflies, but the River that flows fiercely; over the jagged rocks, the shards of broken glass, the sludge, through the tight spaces & the crevices, over-coming all obstacles..... Relentless, purposeful, saturating, flowing. The Peace that passeth all understanding is for the real, down & dirty Life.

  3. You ARE made to be his momma! Have you looked into meeting a GI doctor at CDRC in Eugene? It's on the UO campus, and different doctors from Portland come down 1-2 times a week. We had physical therapy, GI and cardiology appointments there for Thomas when he was a baby. Yay for Joel eating potato salad!!! He needs to teach my boys how to drink from a sippy cup! Thomas was never interested until he was old enough to see other kids do it and think it was cool...and by that time he just used a cup anyway. Henry's still not into it...but there's still hope for him. Silly kids.