It's only 6pm, and so far I've enjoyed every second of the day without effort. I took a walk to a recommended used bookstore around lunchtime. It's amazing what a difference a change in scenery can make. I'm a total wierdo when it comes to book or stationary stores...I don't even have to find anything that I like in there, it's just BEING in there that makes me content. The smell of old books, the feel of handmade paper, drawing pencils... :) I picked up an old book of essays that I read about ten years ago, by my favorite author. It wouldn't matter if I'd read it a hundred times, it's that good, and remembering those stories is comforting. Like home.
I don't know what it was that put me in such a great mood today...maybe it was the weather, maybe it was my company, or the mention of us going home. I know it won't be soon, but even with the mention of a trache, it is reachable...possible...there is a silver lining. Obviously I don't want the trache, but I do want to go home, and if that's what is best for my son's healing, then whatever. Just say when. We'll take it!