Sunday, April 25, 2010
Weight of Circumstances
Long weekend. I was looking forward to it. Family coming up, party planned, Joel was stable...and then, I got the call. Connor, kicking, hitting, and head-butting my mother. No joke. At first I wanted to beat the tar out of him....but after about 2 minutes, I realized...he's in the same crisis as we are. He's been out of schedule for six weeks too. Adjustment made. Connor's now parkin' it at the treehouse with mama. I'm nervous about it but I think it will be good for the both of us. I'm already feeling guilty for not being up there 24/7 with Joel, but I'm going to do my best to incorporate both tasks and try to spend some one-on-one time with the "Connor-man." It breaks my heart seeing this stress through the eyes of a 4-year-old.
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The Special Mother
ReplyDeleteMost women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of special needs children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of special needs children are chosen?
Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting His instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs his Angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew"
"Forest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Cecilia.
"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint, give her Gerard. He is used to profanity."
Finally, He passes a name to Angel and smiles, "Give her a special needs child."
The Angel is curious.
"Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles Gid. "Could I give a special needs child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But does she have patience?" asks the Angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she will drown in a sea of self pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it." "I watched her today. She has a sense of self and independence that are so rare and necessary in a mother. You see, the child I am going to give her has his own world. She has to make the baby live in her world, and that is not going to be easy."
"But Lord, what if she doesn't even believe in you?"
God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps. "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't seperate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied.
"She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her shild says Momma for the first time, she will be a witness to a miracle and know it. When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations."
"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see - ignorance, cruelty, prejudice - and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be by her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And her Patron Saint?" asks the Angel, his pen poised in mid-air."
God smiles "A mirror will suffice."
Erma Bombeck
I was sent this many years ago and although I don't remember who sent it, I have saved it in my stuff with all of Isabelle's pictures. I just happened to go through her stuff today and thought it is something that you are part of in Gods decision!
thank you! that is so sweet :)
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